Computerjargon.com

Before I get started you must know that I love my Mazda. Courtney says that I love it because it harkens back to my Honda Civic hatchback from ‘98. She may be right. Ever since day one, though,  the fuel gauge has been broken. You’ll realize that it’s an important point later on.

On with the story.

The Mazda has been prissy in the cold weather. As the temperature has dropped she’s groaned a little bit louder every morning. Saturday morning I decided to tempt fate.  I tried to start ‘er in the -5 degree weather. She fired 4 times before finally moaning to her death. I wasn’t too surprised that the battery had died but I wasn’t really looking forward to jump starting it in the cold.

So instead of fixing it Court and I went to a movie.

Rejuvenated from seeing Cloverfield, I ran outside to jump the car and head off to Sears for a new battery. Luckily the batter charged quickly and within a half hour I was heading down the highway. Half way there, though, the Mazda started lurching and thrusting.  I looked down at my fuel gauge and it was on empty. This is nothing to be surprised about since after driving 50 miles on a new tank of gas the gauge will read empty. I checked the amount of miles on the tank and I was at 289, which in the summer is a safe amount for a tank of gas. But I hadn’t factored in all the idling and engine warming being done for winter.  I drifted off to the side of the road and called Court for some gas.

I sat on the side of the road for about 20 minutes. -5 degrees is cold. Very cold. I didn’t think the car would cool down so fast. By the time Court showed up with gas I was quite chilly. I pumped 2 gallons of gas into the Mazda and started ‘er up…Well, I wanted to start ‘er up. The battery had drained again in the 30 or so minutes it had sat waiting for gas. We jumped it again and I was off to a gas station, then on to Sears.

Luckily I was able to pump gas and start the car again. If I had to jump it a third time I might have just given up and left the car for dead. I waved bye to Courtney (who was following me around just in case) and was FINALLY off to Sears.

I ran into Sears and was helped by a very nice older lady. She asked what I needed and I told her I had a dead car in their parking lot. With regret she looked at me and said, “I’m sorry, but we are full up with others. We close in an hour. We can’t help you.”

I sighed and tried not to go apeshit. I took a deep breath and rolled my eyes. She watched me and said, “Can you get it home?”

“I dunno. But I’ll figure it out…” I let out another sigh.

“Well, let me talk with my manager.” She walked away. 5 minutes later she waved me into the garage. “We’ll help you out, but you’re jumping in line in front of some other people. So please don’t say anything.” I was quite relieved that something had finally gone my way with this car today. I thanked her profusely.

So the Mazda got a top of the line winter battery. She starts like a champ now. Remind me to tell you the story next time about the first snow and how the Mazda’s windshield wipers hate ice.

We live in a neighborhood from the 1950’s. The houses are all the same rubber-stamped ramblers with wood paneling in the basement. One of remnants of the era is our mail box. Its a very small metal container hanging next to the front door. This means the postal delivery person walk up to every front door of every house to deliver the mail every day.

Each winter the neighborhood receives a polite flyer from the post office reminding everyone to keep their frontwalks cleared of snow so that the mail person can deliver the mail (it also says something about keeping your dogs inside of the fence but that’s typically scribbled on my hand in some crude stalker writing. I think that might just come to our house.). When the snow gets deep some people choose to shovel a path between houses so that the postal worker can short cut through the yard. I am not one of those people. I purposely do not shovel a path since I do not want them stomping through and killing my grass (which may or may not already be dead. I have to wait for the snow to melt.) I shovel a perfectly good path on my sidewalk and driveway that they can use.

We’ve received roughly 14 inches of snow in the last 4 days making for a late winter. I don’t think we’ve had 14 inches of standing snow all season until now. I busted my butt shoveling my walk and driveway each day making sure it was cleared so the USPS could do their job. I arrived home yesterday to find someone had cut a path through my yard with their snowblower. I was livid to say the least.

I was frustrated for a couple of reasons. 1. I don’t like people on my property if I don’t invite them. If I could sit out on the stoop in a rocking chair and a shotgun I would, but I was told its illegal in this state (but not in North Dakota). 2. I shoveled a perfectly good path that they could use. 3. I don’t like the thought that some neighbor (who I shall not name or attempt to guess who it was) sat, at home mind you, all day long looking at my yard and determined that it was well worth their time to walk up my driveway with their snowblower to plow my walkway and yard and NOT plow the rest of my driveway. I think that’s plain rude.

Retaliation has crossed my mind. I thought about putting up chicken wire buried in the snow so next time they take it upon themselves to plow my yard they run into it. I thought about kicking snow back over the trail. I also thought about procuring my own snowblower and plowing all the snow from their yard onto their front step. All I think are complete and rational.

When I finished ranting to Courtney about it, my face beat red, she told me to calm down and get over it. It isn’t worth getting all buggered about. And she is right, I guess. I still might drop our mailperson a very polite letter letting them know that I would really appreciate if they would use the path I keep clear on my walkway instead of the yard, otherwise my dogs are liable to accidently get out of the gate this summer.

I have done it! I have conquered the Minnesota Winter! This morning was supposed to be a record low of 14 degrees below zero. Yours truly walked to work this morning. And quite honestly, I’ve been colder. Unlike the days of middle school when I would refuse to wear a hat to the bus stop in fear of getting teased, I was quite bundled up. I even dared to put on the tights..er…”thermal underwear” that my parents bought me for walking to class in the college years. I also had to break out the flannel-lined worker pants. NONETHELESS, I still have my nose and I made it! Take that Winter! Screw you. I want the nice 40 degree winters back.

There’s a new suggested Napster download. It may be hard to find on Napster. If you can’t find it I can hook you up. For the most part response to my music suggestions has been overwhelming positive. But I highly doubt everyone will like this week’s selection. Good luck on your quest.