Computerjargon.com

I think I’m behind the times on Chuck Norris’ fame and jokes, but I can’t get enough of ‘em:

www.chucknorrisfacts.com

The top 100 facts about Chuck Norris

My favorites:

“Chuck Norris’ calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.”

“Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds.”

“Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.”

“The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer”

http://papernapkin.net/

From it’s home page:

So here’s the scenario: You’re out at a bar, riding transit, or even just walking down the street, and some bozo who desperately wants into your pants starts up a conversation with you. Rather than make a scene or make them upset, you’re polite and at least nod at the proper times. Then, of course, they ask you for your number. Except this is 2004, so maybe they ask for your email address instead.

That’s where Paper Napkin comes in. Give them anyname@papernapkin.net (or paamail.com, to be less suspicious), tell them it’s your address, and when they write you, they’ll automatically get a response telling them how badly they’ve been rejected.

I blantantly stole this from Courtney, who got it from Michelle. Transcripts of OnStar commericals that didn’t make the cut. Funny stuff.

Good news, passed on by Drew, the Onion is on it’s way to the Twin Cities.